Feeling GOOD

I was enjoying motherhood! I was possessive of my son and would not allow anyone to interfere with how I wanted him raised. As a result I often hurt my mother, sisters and mother in law. For that I am sorry but maybe not enough – if I had to do it over again I would do it the same way.
I started to take care of me and I had lost weight for Gloria’s (Worm’s) wedding I was to be a bridesmaid. I was using an IUD for birth control. I started to suspect that I was pregnant but the first week I did not want to believe it. I was in Worm’s wedding and I felt beautiful!! I was aware that there were several guys watching me. I don’t say that as boasting but as a woman aware of her charms. It felt good. I did feel safe in my environment. Best of all Papa and Billy were nearby.
Shortly after Worm’s wedding I read an article about a child born with an IUD embedded in their skull. As I read it I again started to feel like I was pregnant and that my child was at risk because of the IUD. I went into my Dr and told him. He said there was no way that I could be pregnant. But because I got upset he removed the IUD. Eight and a half months later Bobby(Robert, Rob) was born. So I know for sure that Heavenly Father or the Holy Ghost was helping me take care of him right.
While early in my pregnancy with Bobby I went to my cousin’s wedding. She was marrying my former boss. I was standing there talking to them when Billy turned his face and smeared snot all over my gown. Kids are great at keeping us humble.
The whole time I was pregnant with Billy I lost weight. But with Bobby I gained weight. I could not lose it no matter what I did. But I felt good. Hardly ever got morning sickness and craved French fries constantly. I believe that is why he hates them to this day. He had to eat to many in utero.

Papa and I got involved with a multi leveling marketing sales plan. Some really great people became really good friends because of our associations. I learned later in my first pregnancy that if I got enough rest I had less morning sickness. So while Papa got to go to business meetings and socialize I often stayed home so I could go to bed “on time”; if the meeting was in our home I would get up and go to bed “on time”. There is little that I would do to keep from throwing up. I hate that more than any other way to be sick. Well one day when we were at an up lines home in the middle of the day I observed that they were always happy and upbeat. I was not feeling that way at all! [As a mater of fact there were many times that Papa and I fought. Most often about me needing him to be a best friend as well as a lover. He is great at being a best friend now but back then he did not feel that way at all. I had even looked up divorce lawyers and contemplated leaving him.] They had four children and even the children seemed so happy. Well on the way home that day I asked Papa do you think they are so happy because of the church they go to? I even pointed out a beautiful church building that we were passing and suggested that maybe were they went to church. Well then I forgot about it. But he did not. After that whenever I was in bed after meetings he was asking questions. Then he started telling me stories about Indians coming from Europe and about elephants in South America and about a Joseph Smith. I did not know what he was talking about but I did not care either. Well one day he let me know that some missionaries were going to call to make an appointment. I will tell you what happened next blog.


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